Monday, May 19, 2008

Saying goodbye to Lane Bryant

Today I called the customer support line for Lane Bryant, and a nice gentleman named Antoine answered. When I told him I wanted to cancel my Lane Bryant credit card, he expressed his sadness that they were losing me as a customer (or at least he read it from his script very effectively). He then asked why I was cancelling.

"Well, um, I kind of lost a lot of weight, so I don't need the clothes anymore," I said sheepishly.

I don't think that was the first time Antoine heard these words. In a very rehearsed way, he mumbled some congratulatory sentiment and proceeded to cancel the account, but not before offering me a coupon if I stayed. I'd allotted my entire lunch break to accomplish the task of cancelling this account, but it only took about 5 minutes.

Cutting up that card felt pretty awesome. Still, a very small part of me was afraid, as though I was snipping through an umbilical cord. What if I need to shop there again someday? That fear lasted about 5 seconds, then I went back to feeling awesome again.

My next step is to get rid of all my old clothes. I started going through my closet this afternoon, pulling out all the items that are too big. After I finished tossing the clothes on the bed, the closet was nearly empty, and the bed had become Mt. Muumuu. After doing a little happy dance at the base of Mt. Muumuu, I came to the realization that I really need some new clothes! The only piece of wardrobe I'll keep from my 264-lb. days will be my size 26 jeans, which will serve as a reminder of how far I've come. Everything else will be donated.

So long, Lane Bryant. You were there for me when I needed you. For that, I thank you. Still, it's time for us to part. Go push your bedazzled blouses someplace else, because I'm outta here.

7 comments:

Melanie said...

YOU GO GIRL!!! I'm still a faithful LB shopper, but I hope to be able to kiss them goodbye one day too! Are you selling any of your fat clothes on eBay? :)

MaryFran said...

Way to go for getting rid of your 'fat' clothes. I've made that a priority during this journey. Every so often, I've cleaned out my closet and gotten rid of the stuff that is too big. I didn't want to one day find myself wearing those clothes again!

mongolove said...

I have seen the glory of Mount MuuMuu and I have seen the Empty Closet and, brothers and sisters, it is MAGNIFICENT!

deanna said...

holy crap, I laughed out loud- Bedazzled Blouses. I often say that why do these stores always have shirts with funky prints and aplaques, its so annoying ! this is probably one of the best break-ups ever?? right!! YEA for Morgan!

The Lady of Things Forgotten said...

I kind of wish there were a photo taken from the peak of Mt. Muumuu. I'm also kind of jealous of your impending clothes-shopping (it is that time of year where I want to go buy stuff) in part because you have *excellent* sartorial style and I'm excited to see new outfits! (not so I can steal your look on the weekends...really...*looks at feet*)

G.G. said...

Fantastic! I am so looking forward to that day. It's good they were there for those of us that have needed them, but still.

Wasn't it just a little bit tempting to set fire to Mt. MuuMuu while you were dancing around it?

Mal said...

How much do I love this entry!?