Tuesday, March 4, 2008
About last night
This is an artistic rendering of what happened last night. I fell off the wagon.
As I've said before, my binges these days are worlds different than before. Fast food is no longer involved, nor is a gallon tub of mint chocolate chip ice cream. These days, my binge foods usually consist of cereal, yogurt, fudge pops, or nut products. The compulsion is still the same, though. The same things go through my head as I'm doing it, whether it's a Big Mac or a bowl of All Bran.
There were several factors which played a role in my mini-binge. What you're about to read may sound like a lot of whining and excuse-making, and you're right. I still want to get this out of my system, because I'm hoping it will help me deal with it next time if I make it available for the world to see.
Factor Number 1: I didn't exercise yesterday. After running a 5K on Saturday and walking 8 miles on Sunday, I was in a fair amount of physical pain. Everything from my waist down was hurting, so I thought a break from exercise was warranted. Everyone needs a break every few days. The body needs time to recover. Even so, on days that I don't exercise, my diet has a tendency to suffer. I'm not sure if this is psychological or physiological; it's probably a combination of both. Either way, it's annoying and I have to stop it. Taking a break from exercise does NOT mean I should let my eating plan go to shit too.
Factor Number 2: Yesterday was Monday. My job tends to be stressful on Mondays because stuff has built up over the weekend. I work in customer service, and customers tend to be meaner on Mondays. When I get stressed out, I want to eat.
Factor Number 3: I was freezing cold all day long. The temperature control at my place of employment is a joke. People wear gloves and some even wear their coats around the office. Since I've lost weight, I've been feeling colder, too. I've read this is common and it should go away in a couple of years. I really hate being cold. It makes my bones hurt and it puts me in a foul mood. For me, foul moods lead to mindless eating.
Factor Number 4: I drank alcohol. Out of the blue last night, Angie decided she wanted a drink. I thought that sounded pretty good, so I had one too. Actually, I had a shot, and then I had another cocktail, so really that's two drinks. After that, I plummeted off the conestoga, onto the hard prairie floor.
Okay, now that I've finished this post, I'm going to let go of my guilt. It's a new day.