What's up, bitches?

I decided to finally succumb to Facebook mania this week. Yeah, I know I'm really late, but whatever. Anyway, I searched and searched for the right profile picture. Every single one I could find was from my "Morgan Gets Thin" days. I picked one of the better ones and begrudgingly uploaded it.














I say "begrudgingly" because, well... that's not really me anymore. See that chin, and that jawline? Not there at the moment. I'm back to the old days of avoiding cameras and mirrors. I'm sick of being fat, but apparently not sick enough to change (again). I think part of that is knowing how hard I had to work to slim down the first time. The idea of doing all that again makes me want to cry.

Still, I sometimes see a picture like this one, and it makes me nostalgic for last year's "5K May." It makes me miss my running friends, who I never see anymore (totally my fault). I miss feeling like I've accomplished things.

Maybe I'll never run again, much less run another marathon. But I have to do something. I'm not happy in this body. The weird thing is, I wasn't happy with my previous body either. I still managed to focus on the pudge in my belly and not the fact that I'd lost over 100 lbs.

So, what to do? I guess I'll start by grabbing a salad for lunch.